Thursday, 5 January 2012

Obama Will Lose, Says Mexico's Chief Witch

The Brujo Mayor - Supreme Sorcerer, Witch-in-Chief, or Grand Wizard as the BBC likes to call him - of Catemac in southern Mexico has made public his New Year predictions. Top of the list: Obama will lose the 2012 elections.

Speaking at a press conference in Mexico City, Brujo Mayor Antonio Vazquez revealled that Obama was finished. Vazquez was quoted as saying, "I feel Obama will lose. They will attack him a lot. The Republicans have all the money in the United States and so they are putting a lot of pressure on him to make mistakes". An unnamed source added, "Barack bin Obamaladen is going to fall on his Kentucky Fried ass when the Republicans start throwing down the banana skins. I've seen it in the tea leaves."

Using Tarot cards and astrology, Vazquez has been making annual predictions for the last 25 years with some surprising successes. Claiming an 80 per cent success rate, Valequez correctly predicted the Euro crisis. But upset music fans when the predicted death of tween squeaker Britney Spears failed to occur.

Also coming up for 2012: Syria will be invaded; and two more South American leaders will succumb to witchcraft-induced cancer.

"I see more problems with Syria than Iraq and Korea," said the Mighty Magician, "Syria is against the Islamic world and against Europe and the United States. There could be an invasion there or more deaths and deaths and deaths."

Lots of deaths, then, but the good news is that he has not mentioned the end of the world yet.

Source: 'Mexico's grand warlock predicts Obama will lose,' BBC News, 4 January 2012,

Coming up next: do-it-yourself Grand Wizardry. Let's pull out the pack of Arcana and start dealing the future.

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